From the Past

OK: Here are two posts from a past blog I had back during the Summer of 2008. Thought I'd share them with you. Maybe some of y'all out there are bored. haha :) but please, read the real post for today if you read anything. Its after this post.

Little Women

So I just watched Little Women, and if you've never seen it- it is a beautiful story of four sisters during the civil war, their trials with money and a father being at war, their quarrels and joys and their journey of growing up. You laugh, you cry, and then you become reflective...either secretly wishing that you too had grown up in a house with 3 other sisters (or siblings) or you yearn to of been a part of this family yourself caught up in the love that binds them all together.

The most heart wrenching experience of the entire film though, is to realize that the novel was based off of Louisa May Alcott's own personal life, that these events truly happened, that "Jo" was a real person, named Louisa, and the love that is woven between the pages and throughout the film was true, was real, was tangible.

Unlike Cinderella or Snow White, you can walk away from this film, this novel and know that this kind of true love IS within reach, it is attainable, it is Yours for the keeping- to stay wrapped up in the loving arms of your family forever and ever. Beth saw it, she understood this kind of love- and while I wish I had Meg's propriety, Jo's heroine personality, and Amy's artistic ability- it is Beth who I truly wish I could say that I am like minded.

She understood love and family unlike any person I have ever encountered. And although she was the gentle spirit who never left home much except to help the poor(er); even in death she brought together those whom she loved dearly, and even inspired her sister to write the most inspiring account of their lives that I have ever read- I envy such a person.

My hope is to have a love like the "March" family, and even in my death- bring my family together with a stronger bond; and inspire my young ones with the story of my life. That is true living, and true love. This I believe is how God would describe love; through the love of a family- a bond that can not be broken, nor should it be. Its a love that should be cherished everyday of our short lives. And even with its ups and downs it is beautiful just the way God designed it.
-Kate

A Summer Night in 2008

So I'm sitting here in a rocking chair on my back porch, the breeze in my face, the sunset right in front of me, my dog at my feet and this lap top in my lap....yea this is what I call summer.

You know i was reading in 2 Corinthians today ch 11-13 and i was reading about Paul, the apostle who we can thank for spreading the gospel to 1/4th of the population on earth during his lifetime!!! - but its incredible how he was beaten, and stoned, and beaten, and thrown in jail, and beaten, and starved, and beaten AGAIN, and yet he ALWAYS got up and kept on preaching the gospel to anyone and everyone who would listen.

He knew that he had the only thing that could save the people from themselves, and that (of course) was his faith in Jesus Christ. But I find it so interesting today that we have that same relationship with Jesus (now im not saying our relationship with Jesus is exactly like Paul's BUT I am saying that we DO know the Lord and we know who can heal all wounds and cares about the "nitty gritty" we face in our lives)....and yet we don’t share the gospel with everyone we meet. (myself included obviously) But that just doesn’t make sense to me, u know?

We live in a world where millions of people are going to hell, millions of hard working, trying to do “what’s right” people are going to spend eternity in the most unhappy place they can fathom, plus worse. And here I am sitting by the pool soaking up the last few rays of today's sunlight and when its dark I’m going to go hang out with friends... while I have neighbors that dont know Jesus.

You know, Paul was continuously beaten for sharing the gospel, here in the United States that isnt a problem....so why am I not out preaching the word? Why aren’t we spreading the love of God to everyone we meet...the checkout lady at Target, the servers at Luby's ;) , or the person in the car in front of you that you would so like to honk at for going too slow!

Now this is just me vocalizing thoughts God has given me for myself, but how great would it be to live like Paul?!...dont know you know when we get to heaven God would have the biggest smile on His face!! How great would that be to honor God with my whole life and not just a FEW small events?! Isnt that the whole reason we are even put on this earth, to know God and to make Him known?! - Talk about a 'Purpose Driven Life' ;)
:) Those are just some of my thoughts for today.
God is Good.
-Kate

I've Counted the Cost

Today I was reading one of my favorite author's blogs (Leslie Ludy- for all you women out there, and her husband Eric Ludy for you men!) Anyway, she had an excerpt from a different blog ( by Steve and Kathy Gallagher) that I found refreshing, encouraging, and no doubt inspiring!- and I think this could apply to both men and women! Here it is!

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“If it is true that you wish to follow in the footsteps of women like Amy Carmichael and Elizabeth Elliot, perhaps it would be good to ask yourselves what their lives looked like as they were preparing to go into their life’s work. What did Amy Carmichael’s life look like as a young girl before she went away to India? And what about Elizabeth Elliot? What was going on with her as a Wheaton student before she married Jim and left for the jungles of Ecuador?

Amy had an overriding passion to know God in a very real way. She was lit on fire at the Keswick Convention and would spend hours seeking God. She went down into the ghetto areas to minister to young girls. In other words, she didn’t just show up in India and suddenly become Amy Carmichael. She prepared herself.

The same was true of Elizabeth Elliot. She was already making the hard choices before she ever met Jim Elliot. She wasn’t looking for Prince Charming to come along and sweep her into some idyllic existence. She was well on her way to becoming the Elizabeth Elliot that we all admire so much. When he met her, he didn’t see a young woman who would have to be coaxed along and drug into sacrificial living. He saw someone who was already showing by her life’s choices that she meant business with God and for God.

One of the traps for young people is that their youthful idealism can be nothing more than romantic fantasizing about what it really means to be in ministry. But let me tell you something from much experience: Real ministry, the kind of ministry where souls are rescued from hell or where orphans are liberated from a life of misery, is hard. It is very hard.

I will use someone a little more close to home to further illustrate this truth: my wife Kathy. She had a dream job working as a manager in an insurance company. She was happy to support us as I went through Bible school and began Pure Life. But then the day came that the Lord asked us to leave our California comfort zone (i.e. families, friends, local supporters, etc.) to relocate to far, far away Kentucky. She didn’t flinch. For 18 months we had to live in a camping trailer and for several years she was the only female at a rehabilitation facility for sex addicts. And then there were the years of living in poverty: shopping in Goodwill stores (quite a drop from Macy’s), etc.

I think I can safely say that Amy Carmichael, Elizabeth Elliot, Gladys Aylward, Jackie Pullinger and a host of other young women were not merely romantics full of idealistic fantasy about ministry. They, like Kathy, were already living the “set-apart” life before they ever reached those far away shores.

A life fully given to Christ in ministry is something you must prepare for.

Allow me to ask you a few pointed questions as I end this blog:

· You say you want to be like Amy Carmichael. How much of a priority is your devotional life? What about scripture memory?

· Have you really counted the cost of going into God’s work?

There are some of you who have exhibited flashes of greatness, little glimmers of future Amy’s and Elizabeth’s. But let me encourage you not to stop short of choosing the same narrow path these women chose.

If you want to be like the women you esteem – here is the path that leads there… Count the cost, commit yourself to living up to your full potential and go after God with all your heart.

"What is the secret to great living? Entire separation to Christ and devotion to Him. Thus speaks every man and woman whose life has made more than a passing flicker in the spiritual realm. It is the life that has no time for trifling that counts." Amy Carmichael

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Dear friends, let us drop the same worn out, over used American dream for the glorious realities of God’s kingdom for which we were created!*

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider Him who endured such oppostion from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted ot the point of shedding your blood.
Hebrews 12:1-4

In the words of Cory Asbury, "I've counted the cost, I count it all as loss for the sake of knowing You; and until that day, until I see you face to face, I'll be taking up my cross."
-Kate

Love, as it should be

I am beginning to see a pattern in my life. I tend to be utterly moved by a good book or movie, and tonight is not an objection. I have just finished watching the movie "Pride and Prejudice." It is most certainly a movie that is not to be watched unless the mood is observed, and the mood was perfect tonight.
I must preface though that I am also reading Jane Austin's original "Pride and Prejudice" in conjunction with viewing the movie this evening. (if my writing style hasn't already given me away). ;) By the by, I must write of a revelation I had while taking in the drama.
I used to think this movie was so sappy and silly and I must admit that quite some time has elapsed since I last saw it, a few years in fact. I used to think of this movie as nothing but a fairy tale that would never come true, yet I stand corrected. I witnessed tonight a love that I believe God put a desire in all us women since the beginning of time. A love based on integrity, honor, respect, and goodness of character; which in turn evolved into passion for one another.
In our current culture, relationships tend to skip all of the above and are based solely on passion, which in turn evolves into a form of impurity as each involved grows more and more obsessed with the other, making them each an idol to one another.
It is not until Elizabeth learns of Darcy's integrity as a man, the honor that he holds amongst his peers, and the utter respect he offers Elizabeth through out the story- even after she declines his hand in marriage the first time around; that she even begins to fall in love with him, let alone be remotely interested in him.
Where are our women who wont even consider a man until she knows his full character? I myself do not pretend to of fallen ill of this slip of the female heart, but in this moment, I feel God has given me great clarity on the matter. What an astounding display of love based on what truly matters. It is this love that I seek in my life, and I refuse to believe it to be a fairy tale. I am talking about true romance, which I am fully aware that I have with my sweet Savior already, but this post is being used tonight as a manifestation of my trust in Him, that He can bring this kind of love, because He is the author of it.
Now I must interject that I am not writing about a love that eludes hardship and problems, but of a love based on the Lord, on purity and everything that Jesus Christ stands for. For everything He died for on that cross, that we may experience His love and experience it abundantly. It is this kind of love that Jesus wants for each of us. One that protects, one that trusts and is trustworthy, one that honors the Lord in all aspects in both public and behind closed doors, one that aims to do good for the other instead of for themselves. Praise the Lord for scripting something so beautiful since before the beginning of time.
I am resolved to settle for nothing less than this love that God has so beautifully crafted with His own adoring hands.

Until inspiration hits me again...
Lovingly,
Kate

september

struggling today.
I know you others out there must feel the same way at some point, so maybe you'll understand.
Sometimes its hard to find my way back to Jesus' feet. My blinded eyes hold me captive to things of this world. Things that dont matter. I have Jesus. He fills the empty places of my heart, if only I'll let Him. All it takes is for me to let go. When I let go of my control, He always catches me.
I cant shake this feeling that Im meant to do something, SOMETHING bigger than myself, and its probably scary as all get out.
Sometimes life is hard.
Its all worth it in the end.
We just have to keep running the race set before us.
Oh Jesus help me persevere through this time.
- Kate

Proverbs 3:5-6

So i realized something as I looked at this blog tonight.... I dont think i have ever explained why my blog is titled "Proverbs 3:5-6."
Well its a tried and true verse, thats for sure. I could of put up some Bible verse that is really cool and that no one has thought of- sure there are plenty of those. But honestly, the only reason I made it my title is because when i went to type something in.....it was the only thing i could think of. =)
Its funny because at that exact moment-every clever saying, phrase, Bible verse i know...well it was all gone- poof! And nothing was left except for Proverbs 3:5-6. I guess perhaps that's because this verse had been on my mind in light of my current "no direction" of life. I feel now as though God is slowly revealing it to me. I know that I wouldn't be happy doing any other life's work than working for the Lord. And by that i mean I want to passionately pursue Jesus in every aspect of my life. :) And although Im not quite sure what that looks like right now, Jesus knows the way. He always does.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight."
Proverbs 3:5-6

Seeking the Heart of God,
Kate

Example: Yesterday

OK just to give you a little example of what I'm dealing with here people- I'll give you the highlights from yesterday.....

-Was a witness to the signing of a living will (quite sad)

- Walked into a room to minister an elderly lady and found her completely naked laying on her bed- asleep, mouth open. sad and yet, a little funny ( no worries, I covered her up.) :)

-Was talking to a different lady when she had to go to the bathroom, the nurse came in and the next thing I know, the lady's pants are off...

---> sometimes I just wish there was someone else with me during the day to share in the randomness that happens all around me.

oh, and I definitely have a new and HUGE appreciation for nurses and doctors. I know I would get used to a lot of this, if I was either, but I'm not and this is all new for me. I do know one thing though, this whole experience is definitely growing me.
I recently helped a child at a youth retreat when he tore open his foot. While everyone was in a panic I ran to him, scooped him up, and cleaned and bandaged the wound myself! He obviously needed stitches and while I am not a suture (did I spell this correctly?!) kind of girl, I think I packed the wound quite nicely :)
I'd like to think I work well under pressure...and perhaps children's feet as they gush blood. (Sorry to be graphic for those of you who get a little queasy. )

Wondering what else I will encounter this summer....
-Kate

The Trouble with Internships

Ok so today it was REALLY hard to get up and go to my internship this morning. Its just very difficult to go talk to people in their hospital beds sometimes...you never know what you're going to get and Jesus is repeatedly showing me that the hardest to love are the ones that need love the most.
It takes all my spiritual, physical and emotional energy to go up to my floor some days and all my energy to just keep me going into each individual room. I think I'm learning everyday that Jesus did some amazing things when He made Himself unclean for the sake of others healing the sick and raising the dead. He saw past their physical illness to their more important problems- their souls. Jesus was the ultimate doctor and healer.

Also, I would like it if my brother would come home soon- the house is eerily quiet and I'm finding myself making up excuses to leave...it would just be nice to not be an only child for awhile.
Praying God gives me grace to make it through this long day!
~Kate